


Disguises and Second Chances

by ShadowRen



Series: Second Chances [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Ben Solo Needs A Hug, F/M, I tried to do comedic but it became emotional instead, Redeemed Ben Solo, Unexpected Ben/Zay friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-01
Updated: 2020-02-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 02:42:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22506484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShadowRen/pseuds/ShadowRen
Summary: Prompt from @reylo_prompts on Twitter: "Rey brings a First Order intern Randy to the Resistance and pointedly ignored any questions why he resembles Kylo Ren this much. While the Resistance facepalms, Poe asks whether Randy is Matt's cousin or something.”Ben is absolutely certain that Rey's disguise idea is not working, but what happens when the Resistance is a little more forgiving than he thought?My attempt at a comedic prompt that turned out far more emotional than I expected it to be.
Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Series: Second Chances [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1619497
Comments: 23
Kudos: 49





	Disguises and Second Chances

**Author's Note:**

> I spent the past month reading Reylo fanfics while wondering what on earth happened to that ending in TROS. Here's my take on what could have happened, and the overly emotional result of what should have been a comedic fic for my Ao3 debut.
> 
> EDIT(4/2/2020): There was supposed to be italics! I didn't realise they don't carry over through copy-paste from my word processor, and it was only while scanning through the first chapter of The Adventures of Inferno Squad that I realised they were not present and I hastily doubled back here. It should be fixed now!

“Rey, this is not going to work.”

“Yes it will, now shut up and wear this.”

Ben Solo grimaced at the straight blond wig in his hands, then fixed it to the wig cap pinning his natural black hair in an uncomfortable clump. “You don’t have to do this,” he tried to convince her. “Palpatine’s dead, the First Order is all but gone. We could just disappear into the Outer Rim. Find a planet with a lot of green, the way you like it.”

“Disappear?” Rey chuckled, as if the thought was hilarious to her. “Jedi like us? We’d be too obvious. Somebody will spot us eventually.”

Ben hardly registered the fact that she had called him a Jedi. There were more pressing concerns at hand. “And that’s a better plan than this?” He gestured to his wig, his brown trousers and grey puffer jacket with the First Order’s badge attached, and the beanie in Rey’s hands. “Rey, the First Order would never be caught dead in these sort of colour combinations.”

“They let Snoke wear that robe.”

Ben blinked. “Fair enough,” he acquiesced, bending forward to let Rey secure the beanie on his head. “But I still say we could have just gone somewhere. We’ve managed long enough to heal after you—”

_Died_ , he almost said, but stopped himself. He still dared not voice it, as if he might jinx himself and he actually never managed to bring her back. Instead, he replaced the word with a wave of his hand, and Rey understood.

“I know, Ben. I know,” she said, wrapping his hands in hers. “But I don’t think I could be away from them for long. They’re still my friends, Ben. I can’t just leave them.”

Friends that would kill or at least arrest him for what he’s done, Ben thought.

Though, if the reward was getting to stay with Rey, the risk was well worth it.

———————————————————————————————

Barely hours later, Ben deeply regretted his decision.

“Rey, who’s this?” asked probably the hundredth Resistance member since they had landed his TIE fighter on Ajan Kloss. As she had done for the previous hundred times, Rey smiled and patted Ben on the shoulder.

“This is Randy. He was an intern at the First Order. He’s with us now.”

_Randy_ , Ben repeated through their bond. _Don’t you have any better names?_

_Says the one who called himself ‘Matt the Radar Technician’ the last time he came to the Resistance._

Ben did not dignify that statement with a reply. The Resistance member had not left them yet, however, and asked the second most frequent question of the day.

“You look an awful lot like Kylo Ren, don’t you?”

Ben opened his mouth to reply that yes, he had been told that often and no, they’re not related, when Rey blurted out, “Kylo has black hair. Randy’s blonde. Now where’s Finn and Poe? I need to tell them I got back safely and I’m not dead.”

“No, seriously, his face even looks the same, he just doesn’t have the scar—”

“They’re nothing alike, and we really gotta go. See you later!”

Ben resisted the urge to facepalm as Rey dragged him away from the ships and towards the interior cave base. _Way to make it obvious, Rey._

_Shut up._

——————————————————————

“So this is the infamous Randy the Intern,” noted Poe as the two Force-sensitives entered.

Rey raised an eyebrow at the pilot turned Resistance General. “Not even a ‘Welcome back, Rey, we were worried about you’?” she asked, folding her arms with a mock pout on her face. ‘Randy’, on the other hand, wanted the ground to swallow him up right now. Anything but this.

Poe returned the gesture with a raised eyebrow of his own. “He’s made quite a commotion on base. Something about looking like Kylo Ren, which, now that I look at him, he does. You told me Kylo Ren was dead.”

“Kylo Ren _is_ dead,” asserted Rey, “He just… resembles him a bit.”

“Reminds me of that other First Order guy that came to the Resistance a while back with Starkiller’s access codes, too,” said Poe. Ben shifted uncomfortably as the pilot looked at him from head to toe, and back up again. “A radar technician called Matt. Were you two cousins or something?”

“No,” Ben replied, hoping to Force that he didn’t sound too nervous. Just his luck that the hotshot pilot General had to remember his former disguise. “I didn’t come into contact with any radar technicians.”

The Resistance General tilted his head, then turned towards the computers beside him. A lot of the screens had mail, Ben realised. There was more work in fully bringing down the First Order than he had originally thought. “I suppose not. The First Order had a really big crew, and you were just an intern. Rey, why don’t you bring him to the quarters and get some rest yourself? You must be tired from all the flying on top of your big fight with that Emperor Palpatine.”

Rey nodded. “Yeah, I am,” she said, tugging on Ben’s sleeve, and in that moment he could not be more grateful for the reprieve. “Let’s go.”

As ‘Randy’ left with Rey towards the Jedi’s quarters, he failed to spot Poe activating the comm device on one of the nearby computers.

“Finn, we’ve got a Code Matt.”

——————————————————————

As the day passed, Ben resigned himself to attempting to settle into his new identity as Randy. For Rey’s sake, he kept telling himself, but he wasn’t sure how long his sanity would last even for her.

At least, he thought, the Resistance fighters were much nicer than the First Order interns and stormtroopers. Some of them greeted him as they passed each other in the hallway, and a young woman named Zay was kind enough to show him how to do general maintenance around the forest base while Rey went for a meeting with Poe and Finn. Even if he was hopeless with recognising one part from the other.

“That’s the wiring panel, Randy, not a calcinator,” corrected the young woman as Ben pulled out a flat metal piece full of holes from the interior of one of Tantive IV’s many hallways. Ben felt just the tiniest bit of redemption working on his mother’s beloved ship, and nearly teared up at the memory of watching his father tinkering with the Falcon. He wondered where it was now, since Rey had come to Exegol on his uncle’s old X-Wing.

He was interrupted from his thoughts by Zay reaching past him for a cylindrical object and passing it to him with a smile on her face. “This is a calcinator.”

Ben turned the calcinator, examining its various parts. A small fan on the side of the calcinator’s top was jammed with a flaky, black substance.

“Doesn’t look like it actually needs rewiring, huh,” Zay noted when he showed her the calcinator, and took out a brush from the repair kit they had brought. “Just need to clean this up.”

Ben watched Zay as she brushed away the substance jamming the exhaust fan of the calcinator. Something about her brushed the edge of his mind. Something he couldn’t place. She looked younger than even Rey. Had they ever crossed paths when he was training with Luke? When he was Kylo Ren?

Noticing the silence that had grown between them, Zay broke it with her question. “So the Resistance has been a little excited about you lately. A First Order intern coming back with Rey, of all people. I didn’t even think the First Order had interns,” she said the last bit with a laugh. “So what do they make you do there? Caf runs?”

Ben released the breath he’d been holding. At least she didn’t ask him that question. “Yeah, caf runs. And droid wrangling, believe it or not. We had to chase the little cleaner droids around.”

Zay gently placed the calcinator back in place along with the wiring panel Ben had pulled out. “Tell me about it. I’ve had to chase Dio around a fair number of times, and he’s usually a pretty well-behaved droid.”

“Dio?”

“My mother’s old Imperial ID10 seeker droid. He’s with Shriv now probably getting some New Republic information downloaded.”

Zay had everything back in place quickly, and stood up, motioning for Ben to do the same. “Come on, this isn’t the only calcinator we’ve got to fix.”

Ben stood up, towering over Zay’s small stature. “So where are your parents now?” he asked. Maybe he met them somewhere.

The former Dark side user regretted his question as soon as he saw the shadow cross his new companion’s face. “They died.” She looked back at him, both of them stopping just at the end of the hallway. “Don’t look at me like that.”

Ben blinked. “Like what?”

“Like you’re sorry to hear it.” A small smile returned to Zay’s face, presumably at the memory of her parents. “They were brave people, up until the day they died, and I’m very proud of them. They used to be Imperials, you know. They came to the Rebellion, after my grandfather sent them on a mission to my mum’s homeworld and didn’t let them rescue civilians before the Empire destroyed it. It was one of their old teammates who killed them. He’d joined the First Order after the Empire. Worked for the bad guys until the very end.”

Ben schooled his face back into what he hoped was a more neutral look. “Your parents already sound braver than their old teammate.” Braver than him, he added for himself. He let Snoke, no, Palpatine get into his mind for years. Let the Sith manipulate him against his parents, his uncle, his fellow Padawans. Against Rey.

“You’re just as brave coming here, Randy. Looking like Kylo Ren must have gotten you some favours back in the First Order—” Ben barely stopped himself from chuckling. It most definitely would _not_ have gotten him favours. “—but I can’t imagine the same thing happening here.” Zay’s voice dropped to a darker tone. “People are saying you actually are Kylo Ren.”

Here Ben held his breath again. Did she know? Zay did look at him very closely the entire time they’d been working together around the Tantive IV, and her voice now did not assure him one bit. Maybe now she would turn on him for what he must have done to her comrades in the Resistance. Perhaps even for what he did to her family.

Instead, she crossed her arms and continued. “Even if you are Kylo Ren, I don’t think it matters. If I said it did I’d be saying that my parents shouldn’t have joined the Rebellion back then either. What matters is what we do from here on out. Now come on, we’ve got work to do.”

Ben wasn’t sure what else he could do after that statement but follow.

——————————————————————

At the end of their repair run, Ben and Zay parted ways, as she mentioned something about meeting her uncle Shriv and Dio the droid at the landing zone, while Ben went off to look for some food. He encountered Rey, Poe and FN-2187— no, Finn, was it? — on his way to the Resistance common mess, also aboard the Tantive IV. As the Jedi took an extra step towards Ben, he gently reminded her about his disguise through their bond.

“You don’t need to keep up your disguise anymore, Kylo Ren,” said the former stormtrooper, and Ben did a double take. How did he know? He glanced at Rey, who had tensed up and frozen completely.

Apparently the shock was evident on his face too, as Poe continued for Finn instead. “For all your Force powers combined, you two are the worst liars I’ve ever known. ‘He just resembles Kylo Ren a bit’? Try that again when he doesn’t have the most recognisable face in the galaxy, and one that I’ve had to stare down for a number of agonising seconds of torture.”

“You felt like Rey, too. I think Force-sensitives can tell when somebody else is Force-sensitive, or something like that.”

This time both Ben and Rey snapped around to look at Finn. “Finn,” Rey started, “when were you going to tell me?”

“When you came clean about your Force boyfriend?”

“He’s not—”

“We’re not—”

“Whatever he is,” Poe interrupted, “his disguise idea is not working. It’s putting a damper on our work rebuilding the Republic, what with everybody being so on edge about the Supreme Leader of the First Order being in the base.”

“Former,” Ben corrected, to which Poe sighed.

“Fine, former Supreme Leader of the First Order. Anyways, what I’m saying is that you,” Poe pointed accusingly at Ben, “need to come clean to the rest of the Resistance, and surrender yourself quietly without fuss or lightsaber swinging or Force freezing or—”

“I get the idea, thanks,” Ben said. “So am I going to be put on trial?”

“It depends,” Poe answered. “Personally, I don’t hate the idea of one more Jedi helping us out in the Republic, but given what you’ve done…”

“The New Republic will want justice,” Ben completed solemnly. “I understand.”

He felt Rey squeeze his hand tightly. She didn’t want to let him go. Neither did he, but Snoke was dead, and so was Palpatine. Hux. Pryde. The New Republic rising up from the ashes left by the First Order wanted someone to blame, and he knew he was the only face left available. He could be sentenced to death, or worse, lifetime imprisonment. He briefly wondered if it would have been easier for him to die at the end of the Final Order like his grandfather did at the end of the Empire. To die saving Rey’s life.

He banished the thought as soon as it came to mind. Rey would have never forgiven him if he had. Neither would his father. And his mother would berate him for eternity in the Force. Only this choice lay before him. He would take it and have hope. With that thought in mind, he lifted his wrists towards the Resistance Generals in surrender.

“Lead the way.”

——————————————————————

Finn was the one to lead Ben— without handcuffs —to the Resistance mess room. Poe left them for the command centre in the caverns of the forest base to contact the surviving New Republic senators to report on the ‘capture’ of Kylo Ren. Rey followed closely behind Ben, and he felt her worry for him grow by the second.

_I’ll be fine, Rey. It’ll be over soon. We don’t have to hide anymore._

Rey looked up from the ground to meet his eyes. _But what if they do sentence you to death? I don’t want to lose you._

_Neither do I. Never again. But I know what I have to do._

“Everyone,” Ben raised his voice above the din of conversation in the room. “I have a confession to make,” he said as he reached for his beanie and wig. “I’m—”

“Kylo Ren,” said various Resistance members across the room, and Ben blinked. He had done that a lot today.

_Don’t you dare say ‘I told you so’, Solo._

“That’s…” Ben trailed off, lost for words. He removed the beanie and wig anyway, running his other hand through his dark hair to smooth it. “Yes. I’m Kylo Ren. I’m surrendering to the Resistance. There’ll be a trial arranged for me by the Republic soon, I expect. You can bear witness against me then.”

For all his years cutting down any resistance to the First Order without hesitation, Ben could not bear to look at any of the men and women in the room, settling instead to gaze down at the metal flooring underneath his feet. The guilt and shame of what he did weighed so heavily on his shoulders that he feared his knees might crumple from the strain.

“Before you do that, though,” came a voice Ben had not heard in decades, “perhaps consider what brought him here, apologising for his mistakes.”

Ben looked up to find the unforgettable caped figure of Lando Calrissian, his father’s closest friend, standing among the Resistance members. “I’ve known this kid since he was a boy clinging to his mother’s dress,” said the dark-skinned man. “He was a momma’s boy through and through, and I know Leia would have done anything to get her beloved boy back, and for all I know she probably reached through the Force or something and did just that before she died. Hell, I’ve known Han longer than Leia, he used to just crave adventure, but he gave all that away for one last chance at bringing his son home.”

Ben’s mind flashed back to those moments on Endor’s sea moon, his mother’s last call and his father’s memory guiding him as he threw away his lightsaber and his darkness with it. Lando was right, they would have done anything for him. They did everything.

He looked aside to Rey, gripping his hand tightly in hers. His parents did everything, and she did even more.

“We’ve all killed people before. How many of you can say you’ve never shot down a stormtrooper?” No one responded to Lando’s question. “Yet we’re here, making a new world without the First Order, a new world with peace. We have our Jedi,” Lando gestured to Rey, “and thanks to General Organa, we’re gonna have one more.”

Ben wondered where Lando got all this conviction from. He had not seen him since he left for Luke’s academy, he killed his closest friend, and caused the death of his next two closest. There was no reason for him to even utter a sound in his defense.

“I’ve always believed in second chances,” Lando answered Ben’s unspoken question as he addressed the Resistance. “And if nothing else, my fellow men, consider it our beloved General Organa’s final wish.”

Silence ensued among the Resistance members, then Ben saw Zay stand up, in the back corner of the mess. “For General Organa.”

A blue Duros beside her stood up as well. “For General Organa.”

One after another the Resistance members stood up uttering the same line, and Ben could have broken down in tears right there and then. Even in death, his mother had left him one final gift of forgiveness, and he could not be more grateful for it.

“For General Organa,” came one last voice, and Ben turned around to find Poe Dameron leaning against the doorframe from which Ben, Finn and Rey had entered moments before. “Sorry to interrupt the moment, but I have a holocomm meeting set up with the leaders of the Republic. We need to decide the Republic’s action towards Kylo Ren.”

“I’m coming with you, General Dameron,” said Lando. “I believe they need to hear what I’ve got to say, too.”

——————————————————————

A long holocomm and multiple arguments (mostly from Rey and Lando) later, the surviving senators of the New Republic reluctantly agreed to leave Ben’s sentencing to Resistance Generals Poe Dameron and Finn, as the successors of General Organa and the captors of the former Supreme Leader of the First Order. Ben could not help but let out a sigh of relief into his bond with Rey when Poe announced his decision to put him to use in the Resistance and the rebuilding of the Jedi Order.

Once Poe had ended the holocall and switched off the comm device, Ben turned to the Resistance General. “So what exactly will you have me do?”

Poe narrowed his eyes at Ben, folding his arms. “Exactly what I told them you’d do. You’ll help Rey with the Jedi Order, but in the meantime, I’ll have you running some grunt missions. I’ll have you assigned to a squad in the morning.”

The other General, Finn (as Ben really had to get used to calling the man soon), nodded. “For now, both of you get some rest,” he said. “I suppose we all need it after today.”

——————————————————————

Later on, away from the others in Rey’s quarters, Ben finally broke down in tears, with Rey soothing him as she held his giant frame in her arms.

“I don’t deserve any of this,” he told her. “I should have been executed. I should have died on Exegol—”

“Don’t you dare say that again, Ben,” Rey hissed quietly in his ear. “I would have never forgiven you and myself if you died bringing me back and left me alone. Death was the easy way out. Now you’ve got the chance to prove you deserve what you’ve been given.”

Ben looked up to her beautiful face. He expected to wake up from this dream at any moment, that he would wake up in darkness and she would be gone, but no. Here she was, and he would go through his chaotic, rollercoaster life of light and dark all over again just to have her here with him at the end of the day. Another reason to thank his parents and all the powers of the Force that allowed him this moment for hopefully the rest of his life.

“I love you,” he uttered, brushing his lips against hers for their second kiss. A promise of life together, united against all that life would throw at them from here on out. A dyad, together as one, a resonating song in the Force. As they parted for breath, Rey smiled at him, the brightest sunshine light of happiness and hope.

“I know.”

**Author's Note:**

> One of my other coping mechanisms was playing Star Wars Battlefront 2 (2017) for the first time, and I loved the Meeko-Versio family. I got writer's block on the fic about halfway through when I thought about them and thus a surprisingly friendly interaction between Zay and Ben surfaced.
> 
> Let me know if you liked it or not in the comments, and I may work on a continuation of this fic!


End file.
